Life saver

I am someone who is lucky.

And it happens not only for one time but a number of times..

At times, without any sign or notice, the feeling of being isolated sneak in from nowhere.. it is not scary or painful. You just feel being transmitted to another universe or kept inside a tightly sealed lead house or living somewhere beneath the sea..

Everything is vivid, everything is so detached. I cannot tell what is real in the reality. I feel disconnected, like a sub moving along the sea floor and the sonar did not receive a ping. The sub has no destination, it is just moving silently, places to places.

It also feels like walking in a big grain field, endless. A sunny day without a breeze, shadow casting off the canopy of trees, those trees have been grown for ages as the tips can almost reach the ceiling of the sky. But then, no one is around, not even a single tiny creature, you are all by yourself. It is so quiet that you wonder if sound exists. You try to speak out but it just sounds like a squeak.

The "turn key".

It always shows up when I feel desperate - the connection - I am cherished by my friends around, places that I like to hang on with and I was like someone who got invited to a big party.. I can feel the linkage again, I got the VISA to this universe.

Thank you, I treasure a lot on all those "Life Saver", you just don't know how important you all are in that particular moment in my life.

If I am insane

Boom... flash back.

IF I am insane, I will believe in a world having 2 universe. You are here and I am there, no one will come and I will not get over.

IF I am insane, everything will seems to be real, the sound is real, the universe is real, the music is real, my circumstances is real and every single thing is so obvious that it must be happening that way, following its own course, no matter what and no matter how.

IF I am insane, I will feel powerless, I will feel this is the end of the world, everything collapse.

IF I am insane, I will always try to get connected, to send out ping signal, to press the seek button till I find a channel.

IF.. luckily they are just if... since I can't imagine what if it all comes true..

The continuum

I think I am out of excuses from not posting new blog regularly... when so many tools are available to make posting blog even more easier..

Currently, I am trying the Radio Userland and the Bloggar. Have yet to decide which one to stick to, maybe I will use both.. since Bloggar didn't have a Mac client.