Am I difficult to work with?

I thought I can be an up-to-par mentor.. or at least a team-mate that won't be hated by other team member. But recently, I found myself becoming easier to get angry with whatever thing, when they are not developing into what I desire. I lost my patient easily.

Besides, I think I hate lazy ass, if everything has to be told precisely, what I mean is, the detail level has to be go down to every single incident, then why do I need a team? I can do everything myself! I expect people to look for the answer, at least try to, before approaching and get the answer straight.

I hope this is just a temporary emotional issue or the desire to grow strong as a self-centred person will become out of hand.

The struggling body

Heart beating, spirit filled up with anger but still have to accomplish on the task "assigned". Call me someone with low EQ but I would gratefully considering myself as someone with character.

But why am I having such a bad feeling? The tasks themselves are neutral in nature and it is me attaching all the emotion.

Again, why?

I am seeing all these as negative, something trying to act against me and that's why I feel bad. But then, no one is trying to do me harm, I am just projecting this out, considering everyone is pushing me to the corner.

The true corner is, I can't meet up the schedule and I am afraid of the happening. Afraid of being blamed on, being put in the position of fault.

I can't stand for being put in the difficult position, I accept no fault to myself.

No matter how many times I told myself, the failure doesn't matter, the failure is not something life and death. I am not convinced. I am trying to push for the deadline. I am working hard. And I don't see it justify. And I lost my time to do what I want. And that's why I feel angry.

It's that simple.

I feel angry = I don't have time to play.

A child to the end.

The diminishing of self isolation

After Mr. Bell has invented the telephone, people started losing the
excuses from not reporting or connecting to the party concerned. Still,
we are hooked with the avaiplability of telephone network, but together
with the invention and advancement of pager and cellular phone, this excuse
starts fading out.

We can get connected all the time, everywhere.

But it seems this is not enough yet, SMS and even instant messaging
is growing strongly, not only as a thing of leisure but as a medium
for corporate usage.

My question is, am I so important that I need to be reached all time?
Shouldn't there a limit in reaching by anyone, and let alone having the own time and doing something
private? I think we are born to do things important to our own
but not helping others to get there things done.

The technology itself does not necessary to be a bad thing but the people who
use it can be. I just hope that people will recognitize all the outcome
before embracing all these thing on the horizon.